First of all, my very good (for once) excuse for being a dismally neglectful blogger is that I’m participating in my first NaNoWriMo this month!

So! While I’m busily trying to bump up my word count, and while I have several, longer-form blog posts in the slow cooker, I thought I would share a weird anecdote.

(I’m sorry for the title.  It’s truly unforgiveable.  Let’s move on.)

For those newly aware of their sexual orientation, coming out can be a major challenge.  For those whose friends or family members are socially or religiously conservative, coming out can be a daunting obstacle.  For those in the public spotlight, whose image is their career,  coming out of the closet can seem a terrifying gamble.

For an openly gay, blue-state, twenty-something-year-old amateur actor and sometime-wordsmith, coming out is not a big deal.  But it can still be difficult.

Not . . . emotionally, in this case, so much as logistically.

There’s a weird trend out there, which you will be familiar with if you’ve recently existed.  Straight guys love – love! – to pretend to be queer.  It’s the funniest thing.  (I guess?)

And the thing is, I can kind of get it.  It’s silly in the same way it’s silly to feign creepy sexual interest in your friends.  (If that’s your thing.)  And straight people who think hitting on their guy friends is hilarious are probably a huge step forward, in some ways, from straight people who think the queers are disgusting and out to get them (which we are, by the way).

But here’s the weird thing.  I was recently with a group of straight guys who were totally unaware of my sexual orientation, because whenever I’d say something about being interested in men they’d jump right in and expand upon my “joke.”

Here’s an example:

I want to marry a man.

I want to marry seven men.

And fuck ’em in the ears.

Okay.  Maybe I fabricated that particular example.  But the point is . . . really?

How can we acheive equal status for LGBTQ people if being queer is a punchline?

I dunno.  It’s funny, but it’s . . . so not, also.

Leave your thoughts below.  I love you.  I love your nipples and your handwriting.